DEPRESSION DOESN'T LOOK SAD

With the sudden death of Stephen Twitch Boss, people are searching for answers. 

Some are posting about what depression looks like. Some are posting that they are always there and if you need an ear; they are there.

Well, depression looks like you. It looks like me and it looks like your son, your daughters, your grandchildren and your co-workers.

When you ''sense'' that something is off with them, it is. 

When you ask them, are they ok and they say, "yeah, I'm just in a mood". that's depression. 

When you husband/wife/girlfriend/boyfriend asks you why you "look like that" , that's depression.

We cry when things seem to be going great. We cry when things are overwhelming us. We cry when we have no reason to cry. 

Depression hits at times that no one expects it. It happens at parties, at work, at birthday parties and when we are alone. It happens when we paste that smile on our face and "keep it moving" because there are lots to do and not enough time to do it in.

Depression doesn't have a face or a time to appear. It appears when we don't want it to.

Depression is something that can't be helped or gotten over. It is a chemical reaction in our brains that we fight with every day. 

Depression hurts our plans of going out. It makes us stay in the house, even when we want to go outside. It makes us sad even though we 'feel' happy. 

Depression is not something we can prevent but it is something you can help us with.

When we are quiet and say, "oh, I just need a minute" Sometimes that means, we just need a hug. Physical touch helps us when we are depressed. Stop giving us space, space is our enemy. 

Stop saying, "call me anytime" because when depression hits; we WILL NOT pick up the phone. Instead, CALL US .

Depression can't be cured but it can be managed. Medication helps our moods but sometimes we don't know that we need medication. If your doctor isn't listening to you, CHANGE doctors. You need someone that listens, not just writes (a Rx) . 

Depression is all around us, Depression looks like this:

HAPPY NEW YEAR

 I can still say that, right?

I had the BEST Christmas ever!

I spent it in Georgia with my daughter and her three children and my son, from Las Vegas, was also there with his wife and children. Even the dogs wanted to be in the picture. Well, the little one; Nero; was over the entire thing but Harley was there for every single picture! 

I got to actually spend Christmas with five of my 11 grandchildren and couldn't imagine the joy of seeing their faces when they woke up on Christmas morning and saw all of the gifts under the tree. 

Yes, they still believe!

I hope you enjoyed your holiday as much as I enjoyed mine. Here is just a few of the photos that I took. 

Yes, I did enjoy and get some amazing cigars as gifts!

My children and my guy understood their assignment and I love them all so much.

HAPPY NEW YEAR....OR IS IT?

10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Right...because at midnight a new year began and auld acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind....

But for some; the new year is the same because they suffer from depression.

For some; that countdown means nothing more than more depression, more sadness and more compulsive behaviors. (most people that suffer from depression have some sort of compulsive habit. The reason for this is because they need to be able to feel in control of something)

For some, being depressed is especially hard during the holidays . Most depressives had a horrible 40 days. Yes, that's how many days there are from Thanksgiving and New Year Day.

They smiled their way through parties, dinners, cocktail hours and family gatherings. They laughed, joked, sang and was the 'life of the party.' 

Have you ever thought that for some of them; it was an excruciating act that they live through every day? Think for a moment about the person who is the life of the party...how many times have you really seen them out? If it wasn't for an invite that they couldn't turn down. How many times during a month have you seen them look as if the weight of the world is on their shoulders? 

(now don't start looking at everyone like they are depressed but I am sure you can think of a few people that just seem like they are having an off day...a lot)

How many of your friends have depression? 

You may never know because because statistics show that 4 out of 5 people suffer from depression. So from your job; out of 10 people, 8 of them may suffer from some sort of depression.

Why am I bringing you down on the new year? I am not trying to do that. My goal is to bring attention to something that I suffer with. 

I am one of those four. I have close friends who know and who routinely check on me. However, there are people who don't have that. 

I want all of us to be mindful of that person who seems withdrawn at times and you never ask them, Are they OK? Do they need someone to talk to? 

I want all of us to be mindful that some of our friends, co-workers and acquaintances may need a shoulder at the beginning of this month because for them...

The new year; isn't so happy.

WHY NOT ME?

Just in time for the holidays?

I have seen all of the commercials for new cars, new laptops, new shoes, coats, hats.

Those commercials for furniture, kitchen appliances and washer/dryer combos.

So why not me?

So just in time for the holiday, take a look at my entry into: 

What to buy for the holidays. 

Christmas Commerical With B. Swangin Webster

Merry Christmas from me to you!

CHRISTMAS TIME AND THE LISTS ARE OUT

Let the countdown begin!

Christmas is less than a month away and I have some great gift ideas. 

Sure, they may be the gifts I want but if you are shopping for an author, feel free to use them as well.

1. Nice Pen- a nice pen to sign those new novels would be a great gift to give; especially if my name was on it.

2. Portable Hard Drive- I have been through the heartbreak of my computer crashing and it is nothing fun. This little beauty could be used to back up those important revisions you are making.

3. Professional Photo Shoot- Let me be clear; it doesn't have to be professional. I just need someone to dress me up, do my makeup and take some great photos of me.

4. Deep Tissue Massage- After all; sitting in a chair all day and writing is hard work. My back is always sore and would keep me motivated. Hint: Massage Envy offers great monthly plans

5. Pretty Journal- That I can travel with. Notes would be so much better if I had a dedicated place to keep them. Plus it would go nice with gift idea #1

6. Carry On Luggage- Now this may seem odd. This is the perfect size to keep my laptop (17 inches), journal, some extra books and all things related to writing. I would use this bag every time I had an appearance to go to. 

7. Wine- After all, I need motivation and for me; my favorite wine, from my favorite winery would do the trick. Hint: Romano Vineyard and Winery is in Brandywine, Maryland. OK; that's more than a hint. 

8. Touchscreen monitor- Yep; I have a desktop and all I want is a touch screen to go with it. That's simple, right?

9. New shoes- C'mon you knew that would be on the list, right? Size 9 with at least a 5 inch heel. Easy Peasy.

and finally

10. How about purchasing some of my novels. Give them as a set or gift them on Kindle! 

So what is on YOUR Christmas list?

CYBER DEALS ARE FOR EVERYONE

Today starts another big shopping day.

If you thought BLACK FRIDAY was big; then you have never done CYBER MONDAY.

Consumers spend just as much during this day than any other online shopping day.

Please remember this as you are clicking your way around the internet.

AUTHORS LOVE CYBER MONDAY TOO.

This is the day that they may sell a year's worth of books and be able to travel to a new book conference. This is the day that you can buy a series by a new author, for half the price and this is also the day that you will discover brand new reading materials.

If you ever wanted to try a new genre, buy it on Cyber Monday.

Want to get a personalized gift for the reader in your family, workplace or teacher?

Give them a book signed by the author and you will be the best gift giver EVER!

I never liked mysteries until I read Austin Camacho's Hannibal Jones Series. When did I get it?

Cyber Monday 2011 and have never regretted it.

SO take a chance on a new genre, new author or better yet; give the gift of reading to the readers in your life.

And if they have enough books...well there are so many great gifts to give...but that's for the next blog!

Stay Tuned!

IT'S CHRISTMAS TIME AND ALL I WANT...

Hmm, that's a really hard thing to put into words. 


I could say; peace on earth and good will towards man; but you will hear all of that on the +Hallmark Channel in the next month. 
 
I could say my two front teeth, but I think someone already sang that song. 

I could say, two turtle doves but; that's just a little far fetched, don't you think?

So what I want for Christmas is more sales and more reviews. Didn't expect that did you?

Well I'm an author, so of course I want those things. 

If you have read my novels, LET ME JUST SAY THIS or LET ME SAY THIS, AGAIN please go onto Amazon and leave a review. Even if you DIDN'T like it; I'd rather know why you didn't than not know.



So, in this time where I could ask for a lot of things; I'm asking for two simple things. 

Can you do that for me? or should I ask +Santa Claus ?

Tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary

I couldn't let this week pass without addressing the senseless violence that occured at Sandy Hook Elementary School last week.

This tragedy struck many hearts because all anyone could think was; "what if that was my school, my children or my sister, husband, wife, friend?"

Our collective hearts have been aching for those families and for all of the first responders that had to witness that.

It makes us realize that during this joyous time of year, those families will never see the delighted faces and cheerful squeals from their children again.

This is not the time for gift giving but it is about time spent with family. Young, old and the young at heart, need to hear how much you love them. Every day, not just on Christmas.

Hug your child, your grandchildren and tell them how proud you are of them.

It's Christmas!

Ok, well its almost Christmas! My most favorite time of the year.

It's not just the time for shopping but for me, its all about my little village. You see; I started a christmas village about 21 years ago; when my youngest daughter was born. My husband had brought me two small houses to help 'decorate' the house.

I fell in love with the little people in the window and felt like I wanted to add to it. And that is just what I have done; every year, for 21 years. I have added one house to it, each year.

What has happened is that the little village is now a big town with Main Street, Federal Square Avenue, 2 police stations; 2 fire stations, and a strip mall. The neighborhoods have people moving in and out all the time. I also have a military base, complete with check points and did you see the cute little raccoons. Who could pass those up?

Does that sound a little crazy? Well sure it does but it only happens once a year and when Thanksgiving night comes; the 'village' comes alive and every day there is something to see. This year, Dallas opened up a new stadium! Ok, granted it is in my village but there it stands waiting for the Dec. 30th game. Oh, did I mention there is a bar; complete with drunks, and the local park where the local kids are running and playing, right along side the snowball fight. And the 50's style diner is a new established that has been quite busy since it's grand opening.

 

Take a look and tell me what you think I should add next year. (I know, you can't see all of the town, but I can't post ALL of the pictures...well I can..and will, so look for part two leading up to christmas!

Competition is fierce!

Last week I spoke about the 'unspoken' rule of issuing a challenge.

This week I can cheerfully inform you that the challenge was taken and MET by all of my neighbors.

As you recall it started with the neighbor, two doors down, putting out a red bow. This was a neighborhood that only had; at best; one or two houses decorating for Christmas. So I took the challenge and put up lights and bows and then once turned on; issued the "unspoken" challenge to the other neighbors and they have not disappointed.

The neighbor across the street put up garland and wreaths in every window and then the neighbor down the street put up candles in each window and then his neighbor put up bows and a door wreath.

Soon the whole neighborhood was in on the act and the final house; I call it the hold out house, put up their decorations in the past couple of days. I think she waited to see what everyone was doing and THEN decided on her decor. She has a hanging Santa in the tree and then snowflakes outside her front door and then, she has decorated her fence leading to the backyard with lights and I think I can even see a peeking of lights IN the backyard.

So, let's just say that the unspoken challenge has been met...but you never know what will happen next because Christmas is still 11 days away and I could just very well need to do a little more decorating.

Happy Holidays
B. Swangin Webster

Christmas Spirit?

Now that we have eaten ourselves into oblivion; are we in the Christmas spirit yet? I know I am. The way that I get ready is to put up Christmas decorations. This year it was a little different because I am not where I was last year. My residence has changed but I still got into the holiday spirit and what better way to do that then to start a friendly 'competition' amongst the neighbors to see if they will take the unspoken challenge.
Since I'm a writer, I know how to draw out a story by painting a picture that you want to reach out and touch. I did this with my new neighbors by sending the message: "Christmas is here, where are your lights?" Now I didn't go knocking on doors, I simply took my cue from the sad little neighbor two doors down who put up a sad little lonely red bow. However the message was clear, so I stepped up to the challenge. I then enlisted the help of two others and off to Home Depot we went. We picked up solar candy cane lights, potted red poinsettas and clips for the many lights that would be hung.
Then it was off to Micheal's Art/Craft store for the finishing touches of BIG red bows, WITH bells. See I saw the sad little bow as a challenge, and I think I met it; head on!
So after all was put on the house and the lights are twinkling; wouldn't you know that all of the neighbors were 'raking leaves' or so they wanted me to think. But by Sunday evening, three more houses had stepped up to the unspoken challenge of Christmas decorating. Now granted, they are NOT on my level. When I take on a challenge, I TAKE on a challenge. Ok, granted someone tried doing the lights on the deck railing...but honestly, that isn't even worth my time because I KNOW I could blow them out of the water with the bows, lights, and holiday table setting on the table.
Now the Christmas spirit to me doesn't mean shopping on Black Friday, although this year I did and had a ball at noon instead of midnight. Yes, there are still bargins at noon and I didn't have to stand in line outside to get them.
Being in the Christmas spirit means, bringing out the 'friendly competition" amongst neighbors and seeing who will reign supreme.
And the winner is....well if you want to know that, I'll post some pictures of my decorations next week and if you are up to it, submit yours too; I'll gladly hand over the crown, kicking and screaming of course, but I'll hand it over and then I'll go shopping again. After all, I'm up to the challenge that anyone puts out there.
So get ready, set, decorate!
Happy Holidays!