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Today I have a guest blogger by the name of Lauren Carr. We met recently due in part to a posting on LinkedIn about an upcoming event next year on Sept. 13-15, 2013; C3 Conference.
She regularly posts for Buried Under Books blogs and today she decided to drop by.
Ten Advantages to Having a Mystery Author for a Friend (in person or on Facebook).
1. If you’re ever locked out of your home, your mystery author friend will know best how to break in.
2. Who better to show you where best to conceal a weapon?
3. At Pampered Chef’s parties, they are very handy in detailing what kitchen utensils make the best weapons for use in self-defense … just in case your family launches a coup after serving them your world infamous tuna casserole once too often.
4. Mystery authors are less sappy at conferences than Romance authors. We don’t hug as much. That isn’t because we’re standoffish. It’s because we don’t want you to detect our concealed weapons. Since we don’t hug as much, this means we don’t spread as many germs and you’re less likely to catch a cold when you get home.
5. Mystery authors are more exciting. They are the only friends able to plot out your murder and list your friends and family as suspects in order of interest when you’re fifteen minutes late for lunch. (If your friend reveals that the babysitter did it, you may want to take a closer look at the sitter’s text messages.)
6. During those paranoid moments when you think your next door neighbor is a mob assassin because he has been acting suspicious, your mystery writing buddy is the one friend you can count on to not only support your belief, but break into his house to illegally search it for proof. Of course, you can depend on your friend to bring the lock pick kit and know how to use it. (Don’t ask her how she knows how to use it.)
7. If your spouse leaves you for another woman, your mystery author friend can advise you on how to fake your death and make it look like he killed you so that he will spend the rest of his life in jail for what he did.
8. Your mystery author friend is more than happy to run a background check on that new mate you met online.
9. On that first date, you can count on your mystery writing friend to tail you and your date all evening to make sure you don’t end up in a plot for their latest book … whether you want her to or not.
10. We know what countries don’t have extradition.
So make a Mystery Writing friend today!
I’d love to make your acquaintances at any of my sites:
Blog: Literary Wealth: http://literarywealth.wordpress.com/
Gnarly’s Facebook Page: http://www.facebook.com/GnarlyofMacFaradayMysteries
Thank you for inviting me over today, BSW!
ReplyDeleteIf you like this post, be sure to take advantage of the Summer Sale on the Mac Faraday Mysteries! From now to August 5, It's Murder, My Son is available for FREE on Kindle! The other books in the series, Old Loves Die Hard and Shades of Murder are 99 cents. Download the whole series for less than $2. Can't beat that!
Okay, enough with the sales pitch. Gotta go! I have my neighbor under surveillance. I think he's burying a dead body in his rose garden!
Best,
Lauren
I just spit out my morning coffee! Only a mystery writer would 'observe' a body being buried, yet, I didn't hear the mention of 911 being called. LOL
ReplyDeletethis post is too funny because it's all true!! And don't forget - if you're not feeling well, your mystery author friend can tell you which poisons cause those exact symptoms. :-)
ReplyDeletewhich is another good reason never to make a mystery writer angry; because they know how to kill you and make it such a great mystery that no one will be able to solve it; that is unless they write a book about it and tell you at the end. :-)
DeleteGREAT post! I have several friends who are mystery writers. One is a sweet lady--trim, proper, very nice. We attended a conference together, and I joked about her learning how to poison someone while I was attending a session about alpha males in romance novels. I've learned a lot from her.
ReplyDeleteThis is a great post. As a mystery writer myself I agree with everything you said. When I brought my first poison book into the house my husband told everyone he was afraid to eat or sleep.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work. I love your blog. Mary Firmin, Deadly Pleasures
Great comments! Lots of material for another post.
ReplyDeleteI have to admit, my late father-in-law was kind of nervous to move in with us when he found out I wrote murder mysteries. One day when I was discussing a plot line about a wife killing her husband so she could run off with her lover, he flat out blurted out, "Why do you always talk about such awful things?" To a mystery writer, my conversation was completely normal.
Thank you all so much for letting me visit today. I'd love to come back again.
Great post and if you want to meet another wonderful mystery writer, check out Darcia Helle--her mysteries are wonderful!
ReplyDeleteI have several mystery writers as good friends--making a note to myself not to get them angry lol. In my horror short story, I had to learn all about poisons to make the story authentic. Now my husband has the cat taste his food first. :) Great post!
ReplyDeleteMicki