Wednesday, April 26, 2017


Tomorrow is my birthday!

I will be 51 years old!

Gasp, clutch the pearls; I told you my age.

Yep and I'm proud of every year and every grey hair that I have earned.

I am an author. I am (almost) a tiny home owner. I am the mother of 5 grown children and grandmother to 9 (with another set of twins coming in July) and I am polyamorus.

Some of you don't know what that word means but it means, to have many loves. In short. I can date openly and whomever I date; will know about each other.

Unlike what some of you are doing; which is called "CHEATING".

Now, not to much on that subject except this. Being a polyamorus woman means I can date whom I want but not have sex with everyone. This isn't an orgy. It's about having a great, open relationship with someone that you have developed feelings for.

Have questions; feel free to ask in the comment section of this blog.

Now, on to why I am telling you all of this.

Someone close to me, has a 'day of reflection' on his life every year on his birthday. This year I wanted to do the same.

I have thought about where I am in my life and the choices I have made and I have to say, I'm pretty damn proud of myself. 

I don't have to ask anyone for anything; except for the occasional shoulder to lean, cry or hold onto to. I have the cutest car ever! (Baby Blu Mercedes) and I am about to buy my 'dream' house. (Yep; the tiny house is my dream house)

I am an author who loves writing and speaking to others about writing and about the business of writing. 

What more could a woman ask for?

Well there is one thing I want.....

I want to be a part of the NFL draft experience . (Hopefully next year)

So I welcome my 51 year on this planet and I can say; I'm good.

Are you?

Monday, April 10, 2017


As an author, we never want to be compared to someone else. We try to create our own identity and our own voice. 

But let's face it; every story has been written more than once. Sure we might have a different spin on it but its basically the same story we have read before.

How many times do you think they can remake Cinderella? Well if you go to the movies; at least 7 times, starting in 1950. Why does that happen? Because we love the story and we love to watch adaptations.

The same can be true with King Kong. We first saw him in 1933. On average a gorilla will live to be about 40 years old; but King Kong...well he is still going strong at 84. Still making movies; with his next one in theaters now.

Just like with Tiny Home builders. Not two are alike. 

I started looking at tiny homes about two years ago. There were not many out there. Now; you can't look at Pinterest or YouTube without seeing dozens of builders. Some have 50 houses and some have one. Some are made really cheaply and some are luxurious. 

Whenever you make the decision to write, go to the movies or even build a house; know that there are more than one option available.

Do your research. Make sure you know what you are getting or watching. Don't go to the new Kong movie and expect to see the same type of Kong movie from 2005 or even 1933.

I had to pull back on my tiny house love and look for companies that were reputable and also had more than one house under their built. Imagine my surprise when the one tiny house company hadn't actually made the house for a customer; but more for themselves and were 'hoping' that customers would come knocking. 

Why am I telling you all of this? 

Remember this, being an author is more than just writing. It's also about doing your research. It's about you making the best 'version' of your story as possible and it's also about telling it in a slightly different way.

Monday, April 3, 2017


A lot of people discuss the benefits of going tiny or living a minimalist lifestyle. I have now joined in on that conversation.

In addition to being excited about it; I have also learned a few things along the way.

One of the things I have learned is that I am much more tolerating of different lifestyles. I no longer care what the 'crowd' is doing.

I also learned that no matter what you do and who you try and please; not everyone will agree with you.

You can only please one person at a time and why shouldn't that person be you.

Living in a tiny house is not going to be for everyone and while telling people who asked about it my goals, I have found that not every one agrees.

When I have spoken to people about going tiny I get two reactions.

The first one: congratulations and you must be so excited. If you have any questions let me know.  Check out this website and you should check out the tiny house movement online (Facebook, Instagram and YouTube)

The other is: Are you sure you want to go tiny? I don't think you can go tiny, I couldn't do it. Are you crazy? Why?

The thing that bothers me the most is this one thing.

The ones that seem supportive are mostly Caucasian people and the non supporters are my African American associates.

There are communities of tiny homes popping up all over the United States and very few of them are inhabited by black people. I have met exactly one other person who has built a tiny house. She is an African American woman and she and I had a long conversation.

She said she came up against the same thing. Her African American circle weren't very supportive. Although some of them were; the majority of the people who were supportive were the people who were not in her circle. Or they were her Caucasian friends.

It's not that our black friends don't understand but it's harder to convince them that as a black woman I haven't lost control of my mind. I have done research and the common thread is that the tiny house community can be a little clique'ish. Not because they want to but people going tiny aren't that many. They form circles and stay within those circles. They form their community and they help each other. Because there are not many black people building, buying or wanting tiny homes; we have found ourselves on the outside. Hopefully that will change with more and more 'us' buying, building and living in tiny homes. The +TinyHouseTrailblazers is one such group that is trying to do this. Check out their website.

I know that it doesn't come down to black or white but it comes down to understanding vs having questions. Sometimes questions can sound like non support but most times if you explain why you want to do something; most people will begin to see your point of view.

If they don't remember. You can only please one person at a time and it might as well be you.